moving.

hi friends,

This is not an easy note to write. I would even put up there on the level of difficulty with my moms eulogy i wrote a week or two ago. I'm sure you know I've had a lot go on in the recent past. I haven't had the time or energy to put into words what exactly is going on in my life. So i thought id leave you a note and fill you in.

After ten years, springfield and I are parting ways. I cant imagine even beginning to count the number of people that have had an impact on my life here and facebook wont even let me tag enough friends to allow even the most important ones. i made so many connectons through Missouri State, Chi Alpha, vineyard, downtown springfield, Belmonte, pretty/ugly, et al.

You probably know that i spent a month in Charlotte, NC at ZHOP back in October. I went for a one month internship to devote myself to prayer because I felt Gods leadership drawing me there. I had a great time and i really believe in the ministry there. While i was there i felt a longing in my heart to spend more time there. I have been praying about this since then and sometime in February made the decision to just do it. Just move to Charlotte and at least give it a shot. This move feels like a four letter word for faith: R-I-S-K. I had to throw that one in there. i think more than anything what i will miss about springfield will be my family of friends at the vineyard. i love you. you are irreplaceable, i know this.

The days to come will find me in Charlotte, NC. I am going to live in a community of people who are all part of a ministry called zhop (zadok house of prayer) a 24/7 worship and prayer house. I look forward to getting involved with the house of prayer on a part time basis while continuing to work for T-mobile at a nearby store. As i have been praying i have heard the word "preparation." So, i really feel the Lord is getting me ready for some things, which i think is exciting.

the certainties:
i am moving june 25th.
i will miss all of you.
you can find my address on my facebook profile
i will be back, i promise

uncertainties:
how long?
I don't think this is permanent, i'm quite certain of this. Just for now, it is something i feel I need to do.
what i will do with myself.
after ten years in a city, if your name is arin, you meet lots people, make lots of friends, find an amazing church, you run a music venue you start a band and you become quite comfortable. . .none of these of which are in charlotte. :( So, I am looking forward to being a little uncomfortable, though i am sure there will be more challenges than i hope for. :)

not sure what else to say. i know alot of you have been wondering and asking. so i hope this answers some or all of your questions. if you have questions you can comment here or email me.

with all my heart, i will miss you.

arin.

overwhelmed.

overwhelm

c.1330, "to turn upside down, to overthrow," from over + M.E. whelmen "to turn upside down" (see whelm). Meaning "to submerge completely" is c.1450. Perhaps the connecting notion is a boat, etc., washed over, and overset, by a big wave. Fig. sense of "to bring to ruin" is attested from 1529.

of all the definitions i found for this word, this seems to say most of what i mean.

It is the only word that comes to mind to sum up all that is going on.
Not in the negative sense of the word, but in a great fulfilling sense, my spirit is overwhelmed.
Im learning lots. Im actually (or at least i hope) soaking it all in, there's alot to process and alot to chew on in the things that I am taking in. More than i can regurgitate, at least this soon, of what God is doing inside me.

Of the things that I am beginning to see, I am learning about meditation and breaking through what they call a veil (not a wall, but a curtain that we get to push past) in the spirit. There are some really practical teachings that have really helped me engage with God.
One of the reasons I am here is to cultivate deeper intimacy with God and as I'm beginning that, I am realizing that becase i want to know Him, what He is showing me is much different than what i expected. Its less and i might even say not at all about me feeling closer to God, but more that God wants to share with me what HE cares about. It's interesting and i dont quite understand it all of course, but 3 days in and i can feel God stirring me, and planting seeds, humbling me, and teaching me things that i never knew about Him and my relationship with Him. It almost feels like i just began my life as a christian and Im realizing that i dont know a THING! its pretty darn cool, and not discouraging.

so i believe the definition i quoted up there says" to turn upside down, to overthrow. . .submerge completely and bring to ruin" yep thats pretty true and i love it.

I am really glad i get to be here, it feels right.

On top of all of this, im just so happy and excited about my relationship with Jenn. I told facebook, so some of you know, but Jenn and I are now official after spending a number of months praying about our relationship. I think she is the best thing ever and feel completely undeserving of such a righteous woman of God and I look forward to growing in our relationship. I miss her, alot.

im gonna find some dinner and then im looking forward to getting to spend the entire evening 8-12 in the prayer room.

leave me comments, i love reading them.

arin.